When going through a divorce, you’ll focus a large portion of your time on your personal well being. From organizing your finances to setting goals for the future, there’s a lot to think about.
If you have children, you need to put their thoughts and feelings at the top of your priority list. Neglecting to do so can have a negative impact on their life, both now and in the future.
While no two children are the same, many ask similar questions when faced with the fact that their parents are divorcing. Here are five questions you should expect to hear at some point from your children:
- Why does this have to happen? Through honest conversation, you can explain to your children why you’re getting a divorce and the steps both parents are taking to keep their life as stable as possible.
- Where will everyone live? Depending on their age, some children don’t understand that divorce means they’ll no longer live with both parents. Explain how the process works, while making it clear that you’re doing whatever possible to take their feelings into consideration.
- Was it my fault? This is a common question, as many children somehow feel responsible when their parents divorce. You never want to let this thought linger, however, as it can have long-lasting effects.
- What will happen to me? Most children immediately think about the impact of divorce on their life. They ponder where they’ll live, where they’ll go to school and if they’ll get to spend as much time with both parents.
- What happens next? There’s no easy way to answer this question, as even you probably don’t know what to expect during the divorce process. However, you can offer a basic timeline of what you expect. Keep the explanation to a minimum, without a lot of details, so that you don’t overwhelm the child.
Rather than hide your divorce from your children, keep them in the loop as much as necessary. This will free your mind, allowing you to focus more on the divorce process and how to better your life.